May 15, 2006 - Day 6 - Week 6 -
Mother’s Day Yesterday
I have always had the
impression that Joyce Hall created Mother’s Day,
Father’s Day and Valentine’s Day. That is myth, but
Mr. Hall did create Hallmark cards by designing and
selling greeting cards from his own sales truck, his
car. He recognized how special a symbolic gift can
be and his cards targeted those occasions. When we
exchange cards the sentiment expressed can be
referenced for years. I am sure today, throughout
our country, mothers of every size, age, and
description are receiving cards designed by the
current group of artists employed in Kansas City by
Hallmark, and saving them to be read again and
again. An aside: Hallmark derived its name at a
time when Mr. Hall would create his card and place
his mark on the back so that people would know that
they had an original Joyce Hall card; hence the mark
of Hall became Hallmark.
The mark of a caring child is
to remember Mom on this day. In an era marked by
impersonal relationships built on emails and fast
food outlets we all long for the nurturing and care
of a loving parent, especially Mom. When we were
sick as children Mom’s ‘chicken soup’ or the
equivalent thereof would make us feel better---not
fast food, but love food from Mom. Today is the day
set aside to send a card, buy a meal, or just hug
her and say, “ thanks for everything.”
Jay and Peter Kreitler lost our
mother to lymphoma cancer 11 years ago. A
remarkably inclusive person, she grew up in an era
of great change in our country and she always
remained open to the diversity she encountered. She
taught us many of life’s lessons, and suffered with
grace and humor to the bitter end. Death came with
my dad by her side at the place she loved on Cape
Cod. Cancer took her body, never her spirit, and
certainly not her soul.
One brief Mom story on Mother’s
day 2006. The family gathered around the dining
room table at Cape Cod, for what turned out to be
our last supper with her, and she entertained her
children and grandchildren with dignity and a wide
smile. Bald, gaunt, and weak, she made it down from
the second floor, albeit with a great deal of
effort. She did not want to miss this grand dinner
of clams dug by the family and clam linguine made by
grandson and Chef Brad, and she assumed her seat at
the end of the table. On her head was the frosted
wig made of real human hair woven into a silk skull
cap that almost duplicated her hair in its glory
days. At one point she held forth, and to the
delight of all of us, showed us the variety of
styles that could be affected with this wig. She
would slide it forward on her head; spin it around,
part the hair in different patterns, each time
asking for our approval. We laughed out loud that
deep genuine laugh when all is well in the world,
and yet Mom died just 3 weeks later.
On this day many mothers suffer
with cancer as other mothers may be in the active
process of dying. The common bond of strangers may
often be this shared experience of seeing our parent
face off with cancer. One thing we learned as a
family is to celebrate each day as a gift for
tomorrow may not come. We miss you Mom and know
that your spirit still hangs around us all the time;
as does your joy of life and sense of humor.
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