September 1, 2006
- Day 3 - Week 22 - More Birthday Thoughts
Yesterday, we had the opportunity to celebrate
Katy----an important perspective in the context of
our focus on Peter's battles with cancer. Aren't you
thankful for "birthdays"? It's the perfect
excuse/opportunity to direct attention to the people
who matter in our lives----from our spouse, our
kids, or mom or dad to a colleague at work or a pal
in your book club. It's a day when we can step right
up and say, "You know what? You're a wonderful
person! It's a privilege to know you!" Or, you could
put it right out there and say, "You know, I care
very much about you"......or it could be that
perfect opportunity to say "I love you". When you
extend those sorts of greetings on someone's
birthday, people can set aside possible concerns
about ulterior motives and just enjoy the message.
It's simply oh so nice to hear that you are
appreciated, cared for, and loved by others---no
strings attached! Birthdays are a day for doing
precisely that. I'm sure we all hope that Katy was
showered with such greetings yesterday----and I hope
she felt a warm glow from receiving such messages.
She deserves it.
It so happens that today marks the 61st anniversary
of my birth, so I have some other perspectives on
the subject of birthdays. Just as we are grateful
for the opportunity to express our love, support,
and admiration for the birthday girl/boy----so it is
that the birthday boy/girl is grateful to receive
them. My phone has been ringing off and on all
day----my email in basket contains a few messages
from dear old friends---I know there are a few cards
via snail mail that await me at home this evening. I
deeply appreciate that friends and family who mean
so much to me reciprocate that feeling---and take
the opportunity to express it. In my heart, I KNOW
their love and appreciation; the words, nonetheless,
are always welcome. Those affectionate bonds are the
essence of life's most important gifts, a fact of
which I grow more acutely aware with each passing
year.
Today my "birthday gratitude" encompasses yet
extends beyond those loved ones, old friends, and
colleagues. I began the day with my usual ritual of
a good dose of exercise at the gym where Peter and I
hang out and trade notes. As usual, the dawn quietly
filled the sky with morning blueness, the pelicans
cruised the waves for breakfast, and I became lost
in Vivaldi or Handel.......Could there be a sweeter
way to begin a day???? Part II of my regimen is a
brief "cool off" in the condominium pool, before
putting the rest of the pieces together for my day
at the university. Our daughter, Hillary, called
this morning with her wonderfully melodic birthday
greetings...truly music to this dad's ears. She
asked me how my day was going. I looked at the
clock. It was ten minutes til 9:00 am! It was at
that point that I began to consider what prior
birthdays were like at ten til 9:00 when it was the
norm to get up at "oh dark thirty", hustle out of
the house in a rush to drive to the metro early
enough to find a parking place, then commute for an
hour of more before walking through sweaty/freezing
weather to my overheated/freezing office. On this
morning, therefore, all I could do was sigh deeply
and realize how grateful I am to live in such a
beautiful place in a way infinitely more suitable
for human beings. After some 26 years in Washington,
DC, that realization is no small matter.
In the global and more important context, I am
constantly conscious of the comfort and luxury of my
life compared to the pain, anger and despair of the
human condition in places like Lebanon, Iraq,
Afghanistan, Darfur, etc. I can't even begin to know
what each day must be like for children, moms, dads,
husbands, wives........It's clear to me that I am
not enjoying the luxury of my birthday because I
"deserve" it. The obvious inequity of it all humbles
me. Even that unnerving perspective, however, is not
sufficient that I would discount the precious gift
of love, support, and friendship that surrounds me
on this day.
A birthday in itself is a gift. What could be more
appropriate than to say "thank you" to the mom and
dad, grandmothers and granddads, great grandmothers
and great granddads and all those generations of
ancestors who led to that moment in time when each
of us began life? My birthday wish for all of you?
That warm glow of realization that you are loved and
cared for across time and place more than you will
ever know. Enjoy YOUR day, just as I am enjoying
mine. Compleanos!
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