July 10, 2006 - Day 6 - Week 14 - Old Friends, Same Story

As we know all to well reconnection to old friends does not always bring good news for as time passes family changes signal tragedy as well as triumph.

A night awhile back was no exception.  When I first journeyed to California in the spring of 1974 I was hosted by Linda and John Suckling.  John was Sr. Warden of St. Matthew’s Church and he had met me in Kansas City and determined that I might be a good fit at the church. My 17 year tenure was marked by a wonderful rich ministry that continues to inform me today, as well as a myriad of challenges such as the church burning to the ground in October of 1978. There were many varied and less dramatic stories along the way, but John was always a pillar of strength and a good friend through everything.

John and his family left our town for the sunny climes of Rancho Santa Fe, and we lost touch except through Christmas Cards.  When Bob and Linda Wessen invited us to dinner as the surprise for the evening, warm hugs all around signaled that old acquaintances should never be forgotten.

Staying in touch is a good thing, especially when the times shared in the past were memorable, but we are not a society today that is good at this practice. As the evening unfolded we learned of John’s quintuple heart by-pass surgery and my mantle cell lymphoma cancer. After learning the details we reflected on the lives of our children, caught up with career and lifestyle choices, and smiled through the entire experience.  The evening was celebratory, a seafood lover’s delight, and once again a reminder with the uncertainty of the future how special the present is when shared with new or old acquaintances.

Illness and injury both know no boundaries and sometimes because we do not pick up the phone and call we miss part of a family story.  No one is immune to the pain of the human condition, but sharing with others is a way to lessen the burden.  Part of the motivation to write The Kreitler Compact was to give us all an opportunity to reflect on those people important to us during our lives, some of whom we may not have reached out to in years.

A fast paced modern world would be better served, especially in these times of international crisis, family story’s made more complex by seemingly rampant diseases like cancer, and burdensome consumption patterns to simply reconnect with people that matter, more frequently.  One phone company ran the ad for years to ‘reach out and touch someone.’  Reach out and call someone you miss in your life and then give a hug where no hug has been given and feel the warmth – especially if that person is hurting.

Cancer opens doors in some unique ways.  Hold the door open and reconnect for awhile. It is worth the effort.

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